Love and Relationships

Life and love in the A.C. age

Cooped up in the apartment in the A.C. age (After Corona, not A.D. anymore, as this thing seems to be the new marker of our lives) my mind wanders. I vacillate between giddy and doomsday. I wonder about every aspect of life and love and how it will all change, has changed, may forever change.

I remember back when we were completely cooped up, locked down, shut down. Even then I’d try to find ways for my Fire Type to thrive. In my “up” moments, I’d crack jokes to my kids about what we’d all like to do today. “

Want to go to the diner for breakfast?”

“Want to catch that summer blockbuster at the movies?”

“Let’s see if we can get matinee tickets for a Broadway show this afternoon!”

My attempts were met with eye rolls and “Mom…” – the long drawn out kind of “Mahhhhhum” where they make the word mom sound like it has 17 syllables. Even at my lamest attempts at comedy, they’d humor me with a giggle every now and then.

I am the sole Fire human in my household. I guess that’s a good thing. I can’t imagine any of us could stomach two of me isolated in one apartment.

With so little structure to my days now–even as we have stepped gingerly, masks at the ready, back into the world–my imagination has a lot of space to wander. And it goes fast. It flies and sparks off ideas and dreams and fantasies. Often I find myself playing out imaginative stories of what life will be like in the “A.C.” / After Corona.

What will life and love be like in A.C.?

Want to come for a ride with me to explore what life and love will be like in my mind-wandering state? Here’s a little peek into my Fiery A.C. life.

This new world I see offers up utopian images and experiences that span politics, finances, housing, food sourcing, travel, altruism, religion, work life, family life, creativity and collaboration. In my intuitive mind, every A.C. image pulses and bulges with a sparkly, pulsating vibrancy. Juxtaposed with life pre-March 2020, our B.C. (before Corona) world seems so flat and two dimensional. 

Perhaps I’ll share all these bubbly avenues of A.C. life with you over the course of a few blogs. But for now, stroll with me down the path of life and love in the A.C.

In this new flow, old fears in love relationships no longer exist. In the A.C., we enter into bonds of love to experience mutual growth, expansion, exploration, and empathy. We don’t squirm in the face of conflicting needs and unmet expectations.

Instead, we realize that heartache initiates self-expansion instead of it leading us to the depths of grief, pain and the fear of a life lived in loneliness.

Walk with me here for a minute.

What if when our lovers pushed our wounded spots, instead of going quiet and pulling back – becoming victims of circumstance – we tapped into courage?

Courage to stay in discomfort. Courage to feel and even invite in the lower emotions of anger, grief, fear, panic, or worry, and not need to fix the discomfort. Courage to let go of criticism of self and others. Courage to listen. Courage to see the deeper needs of our partners and ourselves.

What if we welcomed vulnerability even in the face of fear of rejection? 

Courage in life and love

The word courage has roots in Old French – the French word for heart is coeur. When we take a leap of faith, of courage, to bond, listen and meet each other’s needs in love – we live from our hearts. We live from a place of compassion for ourselves and each other.

I see an A.C. world where we all live from our hearts. I see us harmonious, joyful, open, and choosing transformative experiences in love. In the “energy space” where I go when I close my eyes, I connect into the light imprints that carry time and truth, and all things good. There, an image emerges. 

I see what feels like a stream. It’s a wide stream, probably 40 feet across. The water is translucent, opalescent and it shifts when you look at it in different light and from different angles. No matter where you are, when you look at it you learn something new about your place in the world and your journey of self-discovery. You learn from the stream because it interacts with your internal environment. It calls out your weak parts and your old beliefs, holding them up for you to inspect, like an almost ready peach at the farmer’s market. 

On either side of the stream spans glorious nature. People gather at the banks. Some are alone in their thoughts, some stand huddled together in groups exchanging stories and kindness. Many drink from the stream to replenish and fill their spirits with the strength to overcome fears around love. Fears like:

  • We won’t be loved (Fire)
  • We can’t meet everyone’s needs (Earth)
  • We can’t stop chaos (Metal)
  • We’ll never know the truth (Water)
  • We won’t achieve our goals (Wood)

As they drink, they incorporate the clarity of something so much greater than each of them individually. They embody the knowledge the stream imparts and then begin to emanate a certain glow. They begin to welcome each other with recognition and empathy. They perpetuate openness instead of erecting walls that hide who they are, what they want and what gifts they have to share.

Life and love in the AC. It’s calm, courageous, lasting. It’s slow and full and deep. In this place that I believe is oh so so close, we are all celebrated for who we are and welcomed to explore our needs and feelings without the fear of punishment, criticism, abandonment or judgement. We perpetually create potential for growth for ourselves and each other.

Life and love in the AC.

Hmm. I’m going to linger here. Bathe in it for a bit.